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WISE FWOM YOUR GWAVE!
Or, even better, stay dead and buried. Why on earth did Sega think that porting the Megadrive version (not even the arcade version!) of this infamously terrible game to the 3DS? Or even to any other console? Nobody, absolutely nobody at all, wanted it, liked it originally, or is ever going to buy it.
Er, except that I did, of course. Um.
In my defence, I did only get it because it was half price. And because… er, nope. That’s the only reason. I’ve bought worse for more money, I’m sure. No, I know that’s not helping.
So, the game then. It’s the same as it ever was with some minor 3D parallax layering. It’s still rubbish, it’s still easy, and it’s still possible to complete in under 15 minutes. Which I did. And, since I did, you don’t need to. Hurrah!
Long awaited by many, 3D Outrun finally found its way onto the European eShop today, and I had to buy it instantly. It’s a superb conversion, actually improving on the original arcade game by making it widescreen and 60fps (not that I can tell it’s not 30fps any more – I’m fps-blind) and most importantly, 3D.
It’s hard to express just how fantastic the 3D effect is. It was great in 3D Afterburner II and 3D Space Harrier, but in 3D Outrun it is truly astounding, especially on stages with road furniture on both sides and bridging over the road. You really feel like you’re in a tunnel. It’s incredible, and adds to the feeling of speed too.
This version also adds two extra music tracks. Neither are as good as Magical Sound Shower, but then, that’s a near impossible task. They’re at least as good as Splash Wave and Passing Breeze though, and it’s hard to think they were not originally in the arcade version they sound so well suited.
As the title of the post suggests, yes, I’ve completed it already. It isn’t a long game, and it’s a bit easier than I recall the arcade version being, but it is still so much fun to play. I ran through it five times (plus a few more where I ran out of time) reaching each of the five goals. Each one unlocks a “car tune-up”, such as better cornering or a higher top speed, and using these changes the colour of your car. It does feel a little odd to be driving a yellow or purple not-Ferarri (actually, the car seems to be an Armani now – no, really, look at the logo), it has to be said.
Excellent game and impossible to play without a massive grin. Especially if you pick Magical Sound Shower on the radio.
Through various deals and sales, I managed to pick this up for just £1.44 today. I’ll buy any old crap at that sort of price, but a few people warned me against it, saying it wasn’t even worth it for free.
Pff to them, I thought. I can decide myself. But what the hell did I just buy? A walking around a pixelated island in some sort of dream simulator? I don’t know.
I started off in the see just off the coast of an island, in lovely sunshine. I slowly walked (swam?) towards the shore, and found some trees dropping big pixelly blossom all over the place. Some flowers from an Atari 2600 game gently swished in the breeze, and large monoliths formed a line which I proceeded to follow.
Some bouncing things caught my eye, but they ran away as I neared. I was close to a mountain so I climbed it, finding six… things in a circle on top. One of them looked a bit like a silhouette of a cowboy. Nothing happened.
I proceeded over the mountain, and on my way down I disturbed a group of what were possibly chickens, so again I chased them. One went into the sea and presumably drowned. The others escaped.
By now it was getting dark, and fireflies, or pixels representing fireflies, floated around the trees. I noticed some flickering lights in the distance, and headed towards them. As I neared, I realised they were inside a stone circle, and were collecting and swirling. As I watched, they sped up, becoming a small ring, which I stepped inside. Time suddenly sped up, with the sun and the moon flying across the sky and days passing quickly. It reminded me of the film of The Time Machine.
Everything faded to white, then came back. Were the trees now greener? It seemed that way.
I found a path, so followed it. A dead end. I retraced back to a fork in the road and found another road. After walking along it for a while, more pixels which may or may not have been dragonflies flew around, and possibly-grasshoppers hopped. In the grass. Like they do. Somehow, once night again fell, I found myself back at the stone circle with the lights, and again I entered it.
Now I’d realised the circle advances the seasons, as the trees were red and brown, with pixel-leaves strewn around and mushrooms (some of which sang and vanished as I drew near) grew in clumps here and there. Autumn.
I came back to the beach, and followed it until I’d completed a lap of the island. A large rectangular hollowed out tree served as my start and end point marker, and an achievement trophy popped as I passed the finish line.
The rectangular tree was peculiar, in that walking up to it caused the sky to become patterned like it was part of a castle wall, and by accident I walked into and through the tree, which popped another trophy and teleported me to another part of the island.
Once more night fell, and, again attracted to lights in the distance I came across the stone circle for the final time. Autumn became Winter, and the island was covered with snow.
Walking became even slower, and the clouds seemed to draw closer, until somehow I’d walked not only through them, but up into the sky. The mountains below were gradually covered in cloud until everywhere was white…
…and then the game ended. What.
This was a surprise. It looked a bit rubbish, and some of the reviews suggested it was average at best, but it’s actually a really good fun platformer, with a novel jump mechanic.
You have a gun which you can use to both shoot baddies and switches, but also use the recoil to jump and boost. The levels have walls to blast through, electricity beams to avoid (and slip through when they turn off temporarily), bounce plates, portals, conveyors, and all sorts of other gimmicks and hazards. Some of these add puzzles to the levels, others require dexterity or timing. Or both.
At the end of each chapter there’s a boss battle against a giant robot. You can’t actually harm it directly, so have to use the environment to do that instead – which is also puzzling on a couple of them.
There’s nothing in particular that the game does amazingly well, but it’s solidly put together, the controls and the recoil feel perfectly suited, and although some levels frustrate, it never gets too hard for its own good. It’s a little short, and some good ideas aren’t used enough (like the red “extra powerful” recoil), but I suppose they need to hold something back for a sequel. Maybe.