ugvm

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Doors: Paradox (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

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This game is sort of one of those escape room games. It’s a lot like Rooms, which I played a while back, but each “room” is like a small scene built around a door that you need to get open in order to access the portal behind it. Each one is themed, and features a lot of smaller puzzles leading up to the main one of unlocking the door.

There’s the usual things for this sort of game – pattern puzzles, getting keys, turning knobs and flicking switches. You also have to find hidden gems and a hidden scroll on each vignette (if you want to reveal the plot and access the final levels on each chapter, anyway). In all there are three chapters with about 15 doors in each, and each door has about 8 or 10 puzzles, so it’s a surprisingly long game for the genre.

It wasn’t very taxing, and was certainly much easier than Rooms was, but it’s well made and enjoyable. And free from some online service like Epic or GOG or something at some point in the past, although I’ve forgotten where.

74: Not in With the Halo Kids

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Hark! A podcast! Verily, the ugvm gentlemen have returned with dulcet voices and witty repartee in Episode 74.

In this episode, deKay, Kendrick and Toby partake in discussion of such things as Ubisoft deleting accounts, Valorant Premier Season 2, Baten Kaitos, Super Pocket – the Evercade that isn’t an Evercade, and for some reason, Skibidi Toilet. Well why not. Naturally, we talk about the fun, and not so fun, games we’ve been playing which include:

  • Code Vein
  • Yakuza 3 (drink!)
  • Phantasy Star Online 2
  • Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest
  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Cowabunga Collection
  • Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder’s Revenge
  • Kimono Friends
  • Project-X Special Edition
  • Alien Breed Special Edition ’92
  • Advance Wars 1+2
  • Mario Kart 8 Deluxe
  • Halo Infinite

Plus! More! You know how this goes down, as we get sidetracked more than once. Why aren’t there good single-player story-based FPS games any more? What game lets you urinate on people? Answers and more inside!

(Direct link here)

Intro music credits: TMNT Theme “Bardcore” cover by stantough.

Don’t forget, if you want to contact us with questions or comments for or about the show, you can email podcast@ugvm.org.uk or publicly shame us @ugvmpodcast on the Twittors, and https://mas.to/@ugvmpodcast on the Mastodons.

The Revenge of Shinobi (Switch): COMPLETED!

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I know this was highly lauded on release, but I’ll be honest – I’ve never been a massive fan of the game. Or the Shinobi/Shadow Dancer series, actually. I don’t hate them or anything, but I certainly wouldn’t hold them up as fantastic examples of the best the 8 and 16 bit consoles had to offer like a lot of people seem to. See also Ninja Gaiden, actually. [Edit: Oh, it seems I like the 3D port of Shinobi III for the 3DS. Well, that’s me correcting myself then.]

Maybe it will have improved with time? Well, no. Not really. It’s still not bad at all, but it feels just so empty and generic. Ten billion similar platformers since are probably to blame. I played through it, completed it, and moved on. And yes, I used the “make the 00 become ∞” thing so get all the shuriken because I’m not an idiot and there’s no way in hell the game is possible without them. I also found it odd that you can’t decide when to use your sword and when to use your shuriken. It seems you can only throw shuriken, but if the enemy is close you automatically sword them instead? A very odd design choice when you have limited ammo.

Oh, and that final boss? With his whippy hair? Utterly ridiculous.

Advance Wars 1 Re-Boot Camp (Switch): COMPLETED!

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After much publicised delays thanks to An Actual War, Advance Wars 1+2 Re-Boot Camp finally came out. Only it was not long before Tears of the Kingdom so although I got it, Zelda was The Thing as so it was put to one side until that was completed because who can be doing with swapping game cards? Not me.

It was with a little trepidation that I went into it. I’d heard horror stories about how terrible the performance of the game was, with slowdown and stuttering and shonky framerates. I couldn’t understand how a slow-paced, low impact, Game Boy Advance game update could possibly have such things but still, I hoped they wouldn’t affect the gameplay. And you know what? They didn’t! Because they don’t exist.

Let me be clearer: they don’t exist for me. I played completely docked, so perhaps this is a handheld issue. Or as I have an OLED Switch, maybe there’s a slight difference there. Certainly though, the game hasn’t been patched in any way since the original release, so nothing has been fixed – it just wasn’t broken.

With that concern out of the way, it was into the game as it gloriously ever was, only with nicer graphics, some speech, cutscenes and a skippable tutorial which seems to play out even if you skip it. The levels, units and gameplay are all just the same as they were 20-odd years ago, which is perfect. It feels the same as before, but new at the same time. A perfect update then, perhaps?

And with it completed (the last level was hard!), it’s on to Advance Wars 2!