Post — Page 117

Akiba’s Trip: Undead & Undressed (Vita)

Posted on 30/11/2014 Written by deKay

Let me tell you all about this game and I will tell you all about this game now:

You’re a boy who goes for a job interview then wakes up strapped to a table before being told he’s going to be a vampire or something then a girl in a negligee carrying a parasol rescues you and you fight and flee but are mortally injured and all that can save you is this girl’s blood so she bites her lip and you drink her blood by kissing her and then you become a different sort of vampire and take this girl back to a bar where your friends hang out and your tumblr_nfv3b7xudm1svmpf2o1_1280 sister lives for no readily apparent reason and all your friends are members of an underground vigilante group and they’re looking into strange goings on in Akihabara like people going missing and stuff so you go out on patrol and find more people who are sorts of vampires and you fight them and beat them by ripping all their clothes off and exposing them to the sun so they melt or explode only sometimes the people you fight aren’t vampires but you strip them naked anyway and they run off and after you’ve beaten someone they drop equipment and clothes which you can equip (even their underpants) or sell or get your little sister to combine to improve other equipment and as all this is going on you have access to an in-game version of Twitter which is hilarious and there’s also a cosplay competition going on into which the female members of your gang are entered and the whole game feels just like Yakuza only with stripping teenagers instead of Yakuza and more boobs.

Rogue Legacy (Vita): COMPLETED!

Posted on 12/11/2014 Written by deKay

My first completed Vita game! And probably my last, seeing as I don’t see myself ever playing on it again. Rather like my PSP, actually.

But the game, though, was fun. The just one more go factor was extremely high, and the need for greed too strong to just go for the win too early. So many attempts at finding a new boss to beat ended up becoming treasure runs, and once I’d unlocked Spelunker as a character class, I chose them whenever possible.

Eventually, I thought I’d best have a pop at the final boss. It dawned on me that the further I progress, the harder he’s likely to be. I don’t know how the game levels up with you, but I was guessing that fighting him at a low-ish level, then levelling up (and trying again), would be better than fighting him at a higher level after levelling up. I’ve no idea if I was right, but having failed a lot of times to defeat “The Fountain”, and then improving my stats a big chunk and trying again, I found him much easier.

With him gone, the credits rolled and the castle reset for a New Game +. I had a quick go, and found that all the harder baddies you came across deeper in the castle in the “normal” game were now front and centre, and my incredible (or so I thought) stats were barely enough to make it through half a dozen rooms. I don’t think I’ll try to complete it, but should the Vita somehow turn itself on in the future, I’m sure I’ll poke at it again for a while.

Things I’ve been playing recently

Posted on 30/10/2014 Written by deKay

It’s a been a little while since I posted, so a round-up of recent gaming adventures…

Hyrule Warriors (Wii U)

Almost 50 hours have been spent on this now. It’s such an addictive game, and considering how few level maps there are (maybe 10?) there’s so much actual game content and variety. With loads of weapons still to unlock, and several characters still mostly unused, never mind a yet-to-be-started Master Quest mode, there’s a lot left to do.

Most recently, I’ve been trying to rank up Zelda, as there’s a mission in the bottom left corner of the map that I need her to A-rank in order to both get a new weapon, and to open up another section of map with another new weapon in. I’ve managed AAC and ABB a few times, but even though she’s level 42 now, she is still too weak to deal with some of the harder captains quickly enough.

StreetPass Garden (3DS)

These few remaining plants are proving to be somewhat elusive. Even when I’ve had a seed with an 80% chance of growing into a new species, I’ve ended up with something I’m already drowning in. Still, at least I’m making a lot of money selling useless plants and seeds. Not that there’s anything left to spend it all on!

Ratchet & Clank (Vita)

Lets just ignore that V word there shall we? I made a mistake and want to move on without much comment or fuss.

Well, someone noticed I’d acquired said handheld, and generously sent me a download code for the Ratchet & Clank Trilogy for it (and the PS3 – it seems to be cross-buy). I’ve put about an hour into the first game, and… it’s rubbish.

Sorry, but it is. Yes, I know it’s a PS2 game so is a platformer from a different time when this sort of thing was common and acceptable, but it’s dire. Graphically, it’s improved over the PS2 (or, at least, it seems to be), but the camera controls are terrible and the characters soulless and forced. Yet another anthropomorphic animal? Didn’t we tire of those in the late 90s? (Answer: yes, we did).

The platforming itself is rubbish, with jumps requiring guesswork and an unreliable double-jump. There doesn’t appear to be a character shadow to see where you’re going to land, either. Your ranged weapon targeting system is broken, as it automatically locks onto who it decided you want to kill, not necessarily who is in front of you or nearest. Didn’t Zelda teach the devs anything about how lock-on should work? (Answer: clearly not).

I’ve spent more time fighting the game than fighting the baddies, and that’s not a good thing at all. Maybe the sequels are better?

Tearaway (Demo) (Vita)

Apparently the saviour of the Vita. I fail to see how. It’s a dull platformer (sort of) with Daddy Pig chatting all over it. A lovely graphical style with unnecessary and nonsensical rear-touchpad bodgery, many seemingly optional tasks which are devoid of fun or purpose (throw the boxes into the hoops? Joy.), and worst of all frequent appearances of my actual disapproving face in the sun, like I’m the baby in Tellytubbies.

I’m really not surprised, as I very much disliked Media Molecule’s previous efforts with Little Big Planet, and although this beats it in style and form, matches it in tedium and disappointment.

Lumines (Vita)

It’s Lumines. Apart from the little face in the bottom left corner which does… something when you poke it, and some different colour combinations and music, it’s the same as the 360 Arcade game from many years ago. Which is fine, actually.

I’ve not played it a lot, but it plays well and the music is nice and I’m not very good at it. So much like the other version then, really.

Rogue Legacy (Vita)

Oh so good!

I’d heard this was eventually probably coming to the Wii U, so would have waited for that, but instead bought it from PSN for the Vita (and PS3, I then found out – needn’t have bothered with this Vita after all…). It plays like a Castlevania Roguelike, where you’re a knight who infiltrates a castle for treasure and, er, probably something else. When you die, you’re dead, but you get to try again as one of your children who inherits your stats and money.

Unfortunately, in order to enter the castle again, you have to pay a toll equal to your entire stash of gold. Boo! Thankfully, you’re able to spend your inheritance before then on stat and equipment boosts, as well as unlocking new abilities and character classes.

It’s very “just one more go”, and never frustrating despite the number of deaths (30+ now for me) and having to start over every time. I’ve just unlocked the ability to boost my loot gathering and also reduce how much I have to pay for another go, but haven’t managed to buy anything in each ability slot yet. I’ve also faced at least three different bosses, some more than once, who have all been completely overwhelming. I suspect I need to play a bit longer and boost my skills and stuff before trying again.

Batman: Arkham Origins: Blackgate (3DS): COMPLETED!

Posted on 19/10/2014 Written by deKay

On the one hand, this is a perfectly serviceable Metroidvania style game with meaty Batman Arkham type combat and a story to follow on from the Arkham Origins game. On the other hand, it’s a 2D game that tries to fit into a 3D space, with the plane you’re on frequently changing and disorientating you, and a map that serves to confuse as much as direct.

Detective Mode returns, but is rarely sufficient to show where to go or what items are “suspicious” enough to blow up or hit with a batarang. No, you have to hold a “soft” button on the touch screen and scan the area for things. The entire game turned into move along a screen, scan the entire screen, repeat, with puzzles or fights taking a back seat.

Sometimes even scanning stuff isn’t enough. A rusty hatch is described as “may break off its hinges with enough force”. Which do you use? Your batclaw to pull it down? Your explosive gel to blow it off? No – your batarang. Obviously. Later, another similarly described hatch needs gel instead. Another time, the claw. Or a fan, which is “possible to stop with explosive”, only you actually need the second gel upgrade. It makes you wonder if you’re doing it wrong, or if you just don’t have the right tool yet.

Overall, though, it was fun. The actual game bits proper, and some of the boss fights, are excellent. The hacking sections and complicated level layouts were not. Oh, and the bit you have to do after beating the last of the three main foes? Meaning you have to run round pretty much the whole map again? That wasn’t great. Perhaps if a bit more time had been spent trimming the fat, even if it meant cutting the length of the (already pretty short) game down a bit, that may have helped. As it is, it was well worth the reduced entry fee, but with hindsight I’m glad I didn’t pay full price.

Blok Drop U (Wii U): COMPLETED!

Posted on 19/10/2014 Written by deKay

I was able to get hold of a free copy of this from someone, and felt a little guilty I hadn’t spent the feeble 89p or whatever it usually costs. Having played it, though, I’m not any more.

It isn’t a bad game at all, but it suffers from two problems: It’s too random, and it’s too short.

The idea is to tap on grey blocks, making all of them disappear, leaving a single red block balanced somewhere without it falling of the bottom of the screen. For the first few levels, it’s mostly puzzle based – remove the blocks in a specific order to make the red one fall as you need it to. After that though, there’s a clear idea of how you’re supposed to finish the level, but the sliding and falling and bouncing is too random. You can do almost the exact same sequence of taps several times in a row and get completely different outcomes. By the end, it just becomes luck or perseverance as to whether you win or not.

And the end comes far too quickly. There are only 30 levels, with each taking less than a minute to complete, even if you have to try multiple times. The game isn’t even long enough to allow you to review it on the eShop – you have to hit an hour’s play to do that! There’s zero replayability too, so little chance of me reaching an hour. How hard could it have been to double or triple the number of levels?