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Pizza Hero (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

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Surprisingly, this isn’t called Pizza Survivors. Because it seems that most Survivors-type games explain to you their genre by including that word in the title. But now you know, you can guess the rest of the game for yourself, no?

If you can’t, then let me explain. It’s Vampire Survivors only you’re a pizza slice and your weapons are all pizza topping related analogues to those weapons in Vampire Survivors. So you have the gun type ones and the rotating around you ones and the random areas of damage generating ones. You’d expect the enemies to be hotdogs and chips and stuff but no, they’re mostly dragons and tenacle monsters and skeletons. Why? Who knows.

Nonsensical graphics and theming aside, it’s fine. To be honest, so long as you get the balance right it’s pretty hard to “do” a terrible survivors clone, and so Pizza Hero is, well, fine. It does nothing new but doesn’t break anything either, so that’s a net positive. Probably.

Loot Loop (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

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Loot Loop, bought only because it was bundled with Gambler’s Table which I already own so it was cheap on the Steam Store, is an incremental auto-battler side scrolling RPG. In some ways, it is a bit like Idle Slayer, but it’s much shorter and much more fun. And by much shorter, I mean, it lasted a couple of days play instead of about six months.

The aim is to walk right, fight baddies, beat the boss at the end of the level, and then do the next level. Of course, being an incremental game, you get laughably nowhere to start with because your weapon is awful and your HP survives maybe one hit. But, each defeated foe nets you currency and you can use that to upgrade your stats, and eventually buy extra characters for your party, magic spells, and various other buffs and skills.

Soon you can best an entire level without even seeing your health bar change, but naturally the next level essentially resets your power as everything is exponentially harder. Loot Loop doesn’t really push the genre (and it certainly seems to be a genre at this point, just look at what I’ve played this year) but it’s fine.

Cube Escape: Paradox (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

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I do like Rusty Lake’s weird graphical adventure/escape room games, with their creepy aura, Art Deco imagery and psychological themes. Cube Escape is another of those, mostly set in a single room with you able to look in each direction and interact with items, such as a clock, mirror and a telephone in order to solve puzzles to (usually) open doors and drawers, eventually leading to the unravelling of some event in your past where you may (or may not?) have murdered your wife. Or maybe she tried to murder you? Or was it a dream?

There’s also time travel, as if your character’s brain wasn’t unravelled enough. Oh, and literally some brains to play with.

It’s all a bit dark, but there’s humour and some silliness, and then it goes all horror and gore for a bit. There are live action cut scenes. And, I suppose, dead action cut scenes. Spooky shadows, things that might not really be there, and all sorts of messages and symbols to decode. Another excellent game from the team.

Cube Escape: Paradox (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

Posted on Written by

I do like Rusty Lake’s weird graphical adventure/escape room games, with their creepy aura, Art Deco imagery and psychological themes. Cube Escape is another of those, mostly set in a single room with you able to look in each direction and interact with items, such as a clock, mirror and a telephone in order to solve puzzles to (usually) open doors and drawers, eventually leading to the unravelling of some event in your past where you may (or may not?) have murdered your wife. Or maybe she tried to murder you? Or was it a dream?

There’s also time travel, as if your character’s brain wasn’t unravelled enough. Oh, and literally some brains to play with.

It’s all a bit dark, but there’s humour and some silliness, and then it goes all horror and gore for a bit. There are live action cut scenes. And, I suppose, dead action cut scenes. Spooky shadows, things that might not really be there, and all sorts of messages and symbols to decode. Another excellent game from the team.

Justice League: Cosmic Chaos (Steam Deck): COMPLETED!

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Why yes, I am seven years old. Because that’s clearly the age the game is aimed at. But you know what? It may be simplistic and childish, but it was good, actually, so stop judging me. It’s not like it’s Paw Patrol or anything.

What it actually is, is a bit like all those Lego games, only without the building and smashing. Or the Lego. So maybe not like Lego games. It does feel like those Lego games though, with similar combat and character swapping and the same sort of humour and cute versions of superheroes. Here, Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman have to stop Mr Mxyzptlk from turning the city into a fishy hellhole after he decides to make himself mayor. The rest of the Justice League, literally referred to by the Big Three as “The B Team” have been facejacked by no-mark DC villain Starro, who himself is mainly there as muscle for Mzyzptlk. So, off you go, mainly in the sewers because obviously, rescuing them all.

There’s nothing complex here, just button mashing to punch and kick everyone. You have a few moves like a batarang or laser eyes which have cooldowns to prevent spamming them, but mostly it’s fisticuffs and dodge-rolls. There are a few platforming bits, and the odd puzzle or button-activating exercise, and some “collect X of Y to progress”, but nothing a seven year old, or an old man like me, should find problematic.

Enjoyable and mindless, which is fine really, isn’t it? I also liked all the niche DC superhero lore references, like minor events and characters from the comics and stuff. And Booster Gold being a tool, as is right and proper.