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What the Golf? (iOS): COMPLETED!

Posted on 29/09/2019 Written by deKay

I didn’t think Apple Arcade was ever going to be for me, and to be honest I still don’t, but that hasn’t stopped me getting the month’s free trial and giving a few things a go. What the Golf is one game that stands out as “working on a touch screen”, to the point where I’ve managed to complete it. And, more importantly, enjoy completing it!

The game starts off as a golf game. Pull back your finger to aim and control power, and get the ball to the flag. Very quickly, however, things change. The flag moves, or you “hit” the club instead. Or the golfer. Or the hole. Or cars, bottles, footballs, bicycles, houses, saw blades, and many other increasingly ridiculous things.

As you move around the map, you reach areas with levels last pay homages to other games – Flappy Bird, Super Meat Boy, Portal, Superhot, Mario, Katamari Damacy and Metal Gear Solid. The rules of the game frequently change, with many ideas used just once then discarded. Instant restarts and for the most part unlimited “swings” reduce the frustration, so the game remains constantly fun. The only level I didn’t enjoy was the final one, and that was because it’s very long with many sections – and I encountered a bug in the final section which meant I had to keep restarting. That aside, What the Golf is excellent.

I do wish it was on the Switch instead, though.

The post What the Golf? (iOS): COMPLETED! appeared first on deKay's Gaming Diary.

Filed Under: Gaming Diary Tagged With: completed, iOS, Post

Things I’ve Been Playing Recently

Posted on 07/12/2017 Written by deKay

I’m aware I’ve not posted in a while, so just a brief catchup. Stardew Valley (Switch) Just reaching the end of Winter, Year 3, and although I’m ready to wed the lovely but crazy Emily, there’s been no rain for the entire season so I can’t see the guy on the beach and buy the necessary amulet. I’ve been making friends with everyone while I wait instead. I’ve also managed to complete Qi’s increasingly more bizarre requests and now have access to the casino, as I really like casino games in general and I even play in the web online in the olympic kingsway casinos most of the times. I’ve not won much though. I think I’m nearly done with the game. Once I’m married I’ll consider retiring, unless it opens up more gameplay stuff. I’m almost 110 hours in and there are other games that need playing. Super Mario Odyssey (Switch) 800-odd moons now. I’ve completed The Darker Side (but not The Dark Side), and collecting the remaining moons is tedious beyond belief. It’s the least fun Mario game in ages now. But I feel I must get them all, so… Million Onion Hotel (iOS) I talked about this for a bit on the ugvm Podcast (which you really should listen to). It’s a 5×5 grid, screen tapping puzzle game that I paid real actual money for and it’s madness. And too hard. I reached the third boss but that’s as far as I’ve managed so far. Picross S (Switch) Not very much though. Just the odd puzzle every now and then. That’s not knocking it – it’s how I want to play it! The post Things I’ve Been Playing Recently appeared first on deKay's Gaming Diary.

Filed Under: Gaming Diary Tagged With: iOS, mario, picross, Post, stardew valley, switch

Yellow (iOS): COMPLETED!

Posted on 16/11/2017 Written by deKay

That podcast that I do, you know, the ugvm one? Well, Luffer was on it this week and he told us all about a mobile game called Yellow. It piqued my interest, despite being a mobile game, so today I looked it up and discovered it’s free. Free! Something I read said it was ad-supported, but I didn’t see any, so not sure how that works. Free!

It also does the other thing that negates the issues I have playing telephone games, buy having sensible, touch-screen usable controls. No virtual sticks and buttons here. Ticks all round.

Click to view slideshow.

The game itself is a set of 50 puzzles where you have to turn the whole screen yellow. The thing is, you’re not told how to do this, and the puzzles are all different (with only a few sharing similar ideas). You have to not only work out what you’re supposed to do, but how to do it.

Some involve pressing shapes in order, others need you to move things around. There’s a Rubik’s Clock type one, a couple involving wordplay, and one with RGB sliders – only they’re not exactly RGB.

None of them are especially taxing, and the whole game is only around an hour long, but it was fun, and clever, and that’s more than enough a free game needs to be.

The post Yellow (iOS): COMPLETED! appeared first on deKay's Gaming Diary.

Filed Under: Gaming Diary Tagged With: completed, iOS, Post

Data Wing (iOS): COMPLETED!

Posted on 28/08/2017 Written by deKay

I’ve mentioned before, but I don’t often play games on my phone. Sometimes, though, one comes to my attention. Like Data Wing did.

Data Wing feels like a cross between Super Sprint, Thrust and escapeVector. You control a dart shaped object – supposedly a data carrier in a computer system – by pressing the left or right of the screen to steer. Simple controls, so workable on a touch screen!


Levels vary between reaching the exit in a fast enough time, racing other darts, finding keys, navigating through heavy gravity, and so on. Skimming the walls with your dart increases your speed, and some areas boost you, slow you down, or  strip you of control temporarily.

There’s a story about a process in the computer, Mother, wanting to use you to become a real human, and a possibly reformed malware entity who suspects Mother might not be all she appears. You can also collect files that contain message fragments from the computer’s owner, revealing another story there.

Data Wing is a simple, short but excellently executed and fun little flying/racing title. And current, it is totally free. Free! Not even any adverts or anything. Amazing.

The post Data Wing (iOS): COMPLETED! appeared first on deKay's Gaming Diary.

Filed Under: Gaming Diary Tagged With: completed, iOS, iPhone, Post

Data Wing (iOS): COMPLETED!

Posted on 28/08/2017 Written by deKay

I’ve mentioned before, but I don’t often play games on my phone. Sometimes, though, one comes to my attention. Like Data Wing did.

Data Wing feels like a cross between Super Sprint, Thrust and escapeVector. You control a dart shaped object – supposedly a data carrier in a computer system – by pressing the left or right of the screen to steer. Simple controls, so workable on a touch screen!


Levels vary between reaching the exit in a fast enough time, racing other darts, finding keys, navigating through heavy gravity, and so on. Skimming the walls with your dart increases your speed, and some areas boost you, slow you down, or  strip you of control temporarily.

There’s a story about a process in the computer, Mother, wanting to use you to become a real human, and a possibly reformed malware entity who suspects Mother might not be all she appears. You can also collect files that contain message fragments from the computer’s owner, revealing another story there.

Data Wing is a simple, short but excellently executed and fun little flying/racing title. And current, it is totally free. Free! Not even any adverts or anything. Amazing.

The post Data Wing (iOS): COMPLETED! appeared first on deKay's Gaming Diary.

Filed Under: Gaming Diary Tagged With: completed, iOS, iPhone, Post

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96: Magic Beans
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What is this word “late” which you are saying? I do not recognise it and I do not understand it and I do not wish to believe it exists! Episode 96 cannot be late, for it was never scheduled. Sir, you embarrass yourself.

Arguments about timetabling aside, we would like to invite you to enjoy this most recent (at time of typing) episode of your favourite podcast! deKay, Kendrick and Orrah huddled round a warm bucket of cocoa and discussed, to varying lengths, the important news of our time – including Nintendo’s Mario Direct, more unfortunate developers losing their jobs because Money, Microsoft increasing the price of Game Pass (again, because Money) and Starbreeze getting several years into developing an eagerly anticipated Dungeons & Dragons game before pulling the plug because, well, Money. Thankfully, there’s some Good Stuff too, like chat about these games.

96: Magic Beans
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95: Bother Me Anatomically
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94: Secrete Yellow Ooze From Their Knees
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