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Super Smash Bros Ultimate: nintendogs in the way

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I am not good at Smash Bros. I can beat many people, but that is because they are less good, not because I am in any way competent. At Edward’s birthday party some of his friends were asking to play Smash Bros, and we put on a seven-player game, with everyone else on one team and me on the other. I lost, but only just.

It was more balanced when I had a couple of people on my team who had played Smash once before, all up to the point where a giant (ninten)dog jumped up to the screen just as I was starting to fall off the side – and so I couldn’t see where to boost to. Stupid dog.

Super Mario Odyssey: back to the sand

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I got Mario Odyssey shortly after it launched – there was some special deal at The Game Collection, I seem to recall – and I played it for a bit. However, at the time I was still deep into Breath of the Wild, and the more expansive and cohesive nature of Odyssey (compared to the more discrete levels of Mario 64, or Mario Galaxy, say) meant that it felt just a little too similar to a large story game for me to keep going at it. Of course, by the time I finished Breath of the Wild – many months later – Odyssey was buried deep at the bottom of the backlog pile. I’ve taken it to various places in the Switch case, but have never been tempted to put the cartridge back in.

Until yesterday, when I was travelling up to London, and realised that the Donkey Kong Bananza cartridge had helpfully been taken out of my Switch 2, replaced with Pokémon Sword. Edward seems to have multiple Pokémon games on the go at any one time, including multiple instances of the same game across different Switch consoles; he makes use of the fact that Pokémon is one of the few games that doesn’t work over the cloud synchronisation service on NSO, and plays on his Switch Lite, my old Switch, and my Switch 2.

Anyway, this is a very longwinded introduction to say that I was planning on playing a platformer, but I didn’t have the game I planned to play, so played Odyssey instead.

I’ve barely scratched the surface of the game. I appeared in the desert, outside the Mexican-inspired village, and tried to work out what I should be doing; luckily the words “The Hole in the Desert” had been shown as the level loaded, and a big light shown from a hole under a large inverted pyramid. Did I make that thing float? I can’t remember.

Why does it have to be so slippery this far underground?

Anyway, after a lot of faffing around with bit and pieces in the level, including finding another moon in a crate which I had to steer a Bullet Bill to hit, as well as experimenting with the controls, I jumped down the hole and traversed the icy platforms underneath, until I reached a boss battle. It didn’t take me too long to work out what to do. The boss comprised a giant floating head and two floating hands, which attacked by trying to hit me, or clap with me in the middle. When one punched the floor, after jumping out the way, I threw my cap at it and possessed it, which then meant I could steer it around and punch the boss in his face with his own hand.

“Stop hitting yourself!”

Overall I added a few more moons to my total, taking me over the number I need to travel to the next area – and I also found a wibbly painting which allowed me to teleport to the metro area early (but only to a very small platform, with no way of getting anywhere else. The temptation is to stay, to find more moons that may be hidden away, but if I do that I know I’ll never progress. Next time I play – hopefully with less than an eight-year gap – I’ll move on.

Donkey Kong Bananza: breaking everything

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When I first heard of Bananza, I was concerned about the way in which DK could smash pretty much everything, I was worried that it would mean you could just brute force your way through the levels, that there would be little innovation throughout the game, relying only on the destruction mechanic.

I needn’t have worried, of course – it’s a Nintendo game, and in the hour I’ve played so far I’ve come across loads of game mechanics which substantially expand the moveset and ways that the levels work. You can’t just break everything and hope; there are different strengths of materials, there are bombs to break harder ones, there are enemies that provide you with stones to throw at others, there are floating islands that you don’t want to drop off the side of.

I purposefully didn’t read too much about the game before release, but my son Edward did – he’s watched countless videos and read articles and listened to podcasts – and he was incredibly hyped to see the giant monkey king thing and water raising a bridge and the little stone companion. I don’t get to play with him watching enough.

There have been some laugh-out-loud moments. Try and hit one of the other apes, and you’ll high-five them instead. You come across an ape who’s proud of the house he’s built, and then one hit of the walls means that the next time you talk to him he’s wistful he didn’t buy insurance against you. There is a joy to the destruction, and it’s rewarding as well, uncovering hidden banana chips and even hidden crystal bananas.

I’ve finished for the evening just after DK lost his stone companion and gained a different one. More on that some other time.

Mario Smash Football: a forgotten gem

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Recently added to the Switch Online service, Mario Smash Football is a five-a-side game with … adjusted … rules. You play in an arena with an electric barrier around, meaning the ball can’t go out. You can, and are encouraged to, barge your opponents out the way, or knock them over with powerful shots, or knock them out of action temporarily with Mario-Kart-type items. Your team consists of the main character (from a roster of nine) plus a crocodile in goal and three identical helpers (such as three toads, or three birdos), and while any of them can pass and shoot, if you are controlling the main character and hold the shoot button for long enough, you can do a special move which has more of a chance of going in.

I had this on the GameCube and enjoyed it; I had the followup on the Wii (Mario Strikers Charged Football) but never played that too much, probably due to the plethora of Wii and Xbox 360 games I acquired around that time. It still plays very well, if a little rough around the edges, and I’ve completed the first two cups (coming in first place, but not winning every game). I am much more likely to play this on the Switch (2) than on the GameCube, though, simply because it’ll always be available when I want it.

Mario Kart World: completed!

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Hah. As if. And yet, I’ve seen the credits, unlocked the special cup, and have gold trophies displayed for all grands prix and knockout tours. This was done on the medium difficulty. By all my usual metrics, I’ve completed the game.

But Mario Kart’s not like that, and Mario Kart World is doubly not like that. The real game in Mario Kart appears at 150cc, the hardest difficulty level, when not only does your kart travel faster (to the extent that you might, shock, need to use the brake sometimes) but enemies are much more unfair, both in terms of driving ability and item use. In 150cc, I’ve completed four of the grands prix in first place, but never with three stars (which are awarded for being first in each of the four races) – I’ve come close, but a combination of blue shell, red shell and lightning on the final stretch meant I was overtaken by a couple of opponents before crossing the line. The controller survived, just.

See, credits.

The course design is superb. I was wondering how they would build on the last few iterations – which introduced the jump boosts in Wii, flying in 7, and anti-gravity in 8 – since having to include all those elements would get a bit restrictive. Anti-gravity has gone (except in one specific case), and in its place they’ve put in rail grinding and wall riding, allowing for some clever alternative routes and reimagining of older tracks. I’ve noted tracks from the SNES, Gamecube, DS, Wii, and 3DS games, though some are quite different; however, you don’t get to lap around the tracks that much since the races in the grand prix mode include a race to get to the stadium. There are a few occasions where, in order for this to be a single coherent world, the roads to the courses are a bit straight and – almost – boring, but at higher difficulties the threat of blue shells means you never relax.

After the 96 courses of the Switch game (with the booster pack), this game could end up feeling small, but the variety of courses should keep me going for a while yet. I’ve hardly done anything in the free roam mode, where you find challenges and medallions and can experiment with alternative routes, and I’ve only spent one evening online (where my best position was 3rd, and my worst was … 22nd). And I haven’t even worked out how time trial really works in terms of ghosts and friends.

Spoilers: there is a rainbow road

And, finally, multiplayer. On Fathers’ Day I spent two hours playing with Nicholas and Edward, through a number of grands prix and knockout tours. We unlocked loads of costumes, and I won, most of the time. Mario Kart n00bs.